I wanted to say a word about growing old, while also laying claim to what I believe may became a common phrase in America going forward. I just want to have left something useful behind when I exit this dirt clod and I don't want someone else trying to steal my glory. As I was rolling along I-35 the other day headed somewhere important to do something important, my mind began pondering the effects of accumulating birthdays. I have accumulated 55 of them so far and it seems like the more I get the less I have. I'm probably more forgetful than I remember and leave a minimum of 2 rooms a day never arriving at the reason I ventured into them. A bad day is often of my own making, though I thoughtfully blame others so as not to hurt my own feelings. I leave the house 2 or 3 times every morning but still get to work without something I intended to take. I leave the house, drive around the block and pull back up in front of the house to fetch my phone only to find "someone" has locked the door. While stewing on the way to work about why my family is so paranoid that they have to lock the door when I am barely out of it, a vague memory, seemingly from the high school era of my life, haunts me for a couple of miles until I am forced to face the reality that I locked the door on my way out. Once I went out of my way to go by and take pictures of a house we were having built over a several month period of time, only to find out there was no film in the camera. It was little relief to find, also, that I was taking pictures of the wrong lot, though I could at least spread the embarrassment out over more of the story. It seems like the very embarrassing fact takes a bit of the edge off of the extremely embarrassing fact that follows it. At least I like to think so. Well, back to my drive and the usual meaningless ponderings that accompany it. A term popped into my head that I believe, more than any previous known term, defines the adverse effects of collecting birthdays. I am moving toward "Mental Insolvency"
Remember, you heard it here first.
